lifted

Aquarius sign, rhani, computer illustration, a work for Jakarta24 Magazine, 2003

Pernah ngalamain kejadian kayak gini gak?

Weekend kemarin gw lg jalan2 ke hero.. trus pas lagi nyusurin aisle-nya, eh..eh..eh.. ada apa tuh.. warna yg gw kok rasanya familiar skali yaa… O-o-o.. ternyata ada cewek pake baju yg sama dg yg gw lagi pake saat itu. Di dalem hati ada rasa gimanaa gitu ya.. dari kemarin gw coba nyari kata2 ngelukiskan perasaan itu tapi belom bisa nemuin rumusan yg tepatnya. Hahaha…

Sebenernya sih kejadian gitu ngga ajaib, mengingat baju itu kan benda yg diproduksi massal (gw gak cukup tajir buat pesen 1 baju eksklusif dari desainer kondang :p). Cuman ya itu tadi.. rasanya gimanaaa gitu kalo ngalamin kejadian gini. Apalagi di pesta. Wah, kalo di pesta sih lain soal ya.. Mungkin gw akan pake aksesori apa gitu, yg cukup gede buat bikin penampilan gw jd beda.

Anyway,.. gw perhatiin dari jauh tu cewek kembaran gw itu.. trus gw mulai berpikir jelek deh, “Fiuh.. untung kerenan gw.. Kaos itu jatuhnya lebih bagus di badan gw”. halahh.. gak penting banget yaaa…. so shallow yaa… But, it’s so human juga sih.. (Thank God I’m still human.. even if it’s in negative meaning :p)

Tapi ternyata ada juga orang yg agak sedikit berlebihan nanggepin hal macam gini. Pernah ada temen gw, begitu tau bajunya sama dg yg dipake orang, tuh baju langsung masuk tong sampah. Yay…

Note: Soal gambar diatas, kayaknya ketinggalan deh, belom sempet gw post bareng zodiak2 yg lain dulu. Tapi gak papa lah.. Dipost sekarang malah pas kok ya, sama bulannya

Buat yg merasa berulang tahun di bulan ini.., selamat ya..

While the Moon’s Away.., rhani, computer illustration, original work, 2007

Gambar diatas ini sebetulnya terinspirasi lagu “High” nya James Blunt. Tapi entah kenapa kok gambarnya malah nuansanya naive begini.. Hehe.. aneh.. Padahal ngebuatnya juga sambil dengerin lagu itu di iTunes. Heeran…. Well, maybe nothing’s wrong with it.. maybe it’s what I feel about the song.. (?)

To Ella, this work is my tribute to JB too.. Kesannya gak mau kalah gitu gw.. hihihi.. Hidup JB!!!

Will you be my shoulder when I’m grey and older?
Promise me tomorrow starts with you,
Getting high; running wild among all the stars above.
Sometimes it’s hard to believe you remember me…

Terus.. gw lagi suka banget sama lagu ini. Lyricnya sesuai banget sama suasana hati & keadaan gw saat ini:

I’m here without you baby
but your still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby
and I dream about you all the time
I’m here without you baby
but your still with me in my dreams
And tonight it’s only you and me

Ada yg tau lagu siapa itu? Hehe.. (pertanyaan retoris sih sebenernya )

Actually, someone gave it to me. I really love love it ever since! And love the one who gave it to me too.

So, what song suits your mood today?

Caramuru part2, rhani, color pencil & pastel on paper, illustration for Femina Magazine, for story: “Caramuru”, 1999

Orang2 yg dekat dg gw umumnya tau kalo gw suka ngumpulin bon2 pembayaran & kwitansi2, belum lagi sobekan tiket nonton, tiket pesawat/ kereta api ato karcis parkir. Kalo buat gw, ini sebagai ganti dari menulis diary yg dulu sempet gw jadikan kebiasaan waktu gw masih SMP. Dg ngeliat tanggal yg tertera di lembaran2 itu gw langsung inget kejadian2 yg berhubungan. Malah biasanya jamnya juga tercantum. Jadi lebih akurat Sebetulnya lebih asik begini sih, ketimbang nulis diary. Selain gw suka gak konsisten moodnya untuk bisa secara teratur nulis tiap hari, receipt2 itu juga ngelatih memory gw untuk meluaskan ingatan dari informasi minim yg tertera di secarik kertas itu ke peristiwa2 yg berhubungan dengannya. yah, mirip riak air yg meluas deh. Gitu kira2 kalo divisualisasikan Oh ya.. ada lagi satu kebiasaan gw, yaitu nyalin sms2 dari inbox hape gw. Lengkap dg tanggal, jam & pengirim. Nah, lengkap sudah sistem diary gw! ^_^ V.

–To Live In The Past & To Live with The Past–

Someone asked me recently why do I keep those tokens & keep sakes. Then I began to give a serious thought about it. (heheh)

So… Lemme see… hmmm…. I think the reason why I keep them is because I value my past as much as I value myself. I respect whatever happened to me in the past as what have made me what I am today. BUT.. that doesn’t mean that I live in the past.

You see,.. there’s a big difference between to live in the past and to live with the past. Sometimes, someone can’t accept what had happened to them in the past & therefore, wants to forget the memory. Even wish to erase ‘em. On the contrary, sometimes someone wish to go back to the past.. to the time when He/ She had better time, to the presence of their loved ones around them, perhaps.. and to make it worse, get obsessed with it. This is what I call “To live in the past.” I, myself,.. just accept my memories.. Beautiful ones.. sad ones.. success & failure.. That is, I think, my way of keeping sane. And my way of trying to grasp what live is all about. I keep memories but not drowned in them. And I don’t move backwards..
..This is what I call “To live with the past.”